You've Got a Lot to Learn
by Chaos Supernova
Summary: Sam teaches Danny in the ways of girls and flirting. Alternately titled, The Magic of Speed Dating.


You've Got a Lot to Learn

One-Shot

 **Dam you plot bunnies. Just a warning, there are The Fault in Our Stars spoilers in here, so if you haven't read the book yet and want to, just...skip over the part, which I don't want to mark, because I don't really want to break the flow of the story...just...um...read the book and come back to this. Or, if you have no interest in the book whatsoever and don't know what it is, read the book instead of this, the book is much better than some fanfiction written by a 12-year old. There's a reason why it's published, you know.**

"MOVIE NIGHT!" Those two words brought the other three teens into Sam's room, Ava's nose buried in a romance novel, Luke finishing a protein shake, and Danny with a towel around his neck and his hair wet, like he just got out of the shower.

"What movie?" Luke asked, chucking the empty bottle into Sam's trash can.

"I'm thinking romantic comedy. I found a way to hack into Fury's movie library on his top secret S.H.I.E.L.D system. Surprisingly, he has a ton of rom coms in there. I'm wondering if that's a good thing or a bad thing... But anyways, there's this movie called When In Rome which sounds HILARIOUS!" Sam clicked the TV on in his room, it was a large TV, he had asked for an extra large one knowing that they would probably continue the movie nights like they had at Peter's house.

"Oh, I think I watched that one...and it is, I laughed so hard!" Ava said, curling up on the sofa, putting her book down on the coffee table.

"Cool. I'm down for it." Luke propped his feet up on the ottoman in front of the recliner. Danny took the recliner opposite Luke's, and Sam sat down beside Ava, turning on the TV.

"How'd you figure out to get into Fury's movie library?" Ava asked.

"I just randomly guessed his password. EyePatch1234. I think Tony Stark changed it," Sam said, shrugging nonchalantly.

He flicked through the plethora of movies, until he came to When In Rome. Grinning, he turned it on.

Luke, Ava, and Sam were in fits of giggles about thirty minutes into the movie, but Danny remained silent with this confused look on his face.

"Why is the man staring at her like that?" Danny asked, when Nick was staring at Beth twirling around in the fountain like a lovesick puppy.

"Because he likes her and thinks she's cute...?" Sam supplied, waiting for the "ohh" of understanding. But it never came.

Sam sighed. "You've never had a crush before?"

"Crush?" Danny asked, tilting his head in confusion.

"Like, someone who you're...um...attracted to. Who you like in a romantic sort of way. You get what I'm saying?" Sam said, praying Danny would understand.

"I've never felt that way for anyone. I've been living in a monastery for the majority of my life, do you really think there would be anyone for me to have a 'crush' on?" he said, emphasizing crush.

"Yeah, that makes sense... You've got a lot to learn, man. A lot to learn. Tell you what, tomorrow's Saturday, you, me, Luke. We go out, and flirt." Sam smiled smugly.

"Flirt?" Danny echoed.

"Yeah. As in talk to a girl with romantic undertones in your voice. Like, Ava, can I use you as an example?" Sam asked.

Ava crossed her arms. "Try me."

"Well, pretend Ava and I are two strangers, or sort of acquaintances. First, you 'accidentally'-" Sam put air quotes around "accidentally", "bump into them, or sit next to them, or somehow get near them. If you bump into them, apologize, and smile at them, asking for their name. Then you make small talk. If you sit next to them, make small talk, then introduce yourself. Simple as that. Now pass the popcorn. I wanna finish this movie."

Sam blinked, rolling over in bed. Was it morning? It was too early to be morning. This was Saturday, he was supposed to be sleeping in right now. Then he remembered, he was going to teach Danny how to flirt.

Well, throw sleeping in out the window, because this was going to be hilarious! Danny was literally like romancing the stone.

He rolled out of bed, pulled some shorts and an orange t-shirt on, the one his mom had sent him back from Carefree, the one with the white circle on it, the one he had been wearing when everything with the helmet had started. Brought back memories. Some good, some bad.

"Hey hey hey, Danny! You up yet?" he called, knocking on Danny's door. It slid open, revealing Danny, dressed in civilian clothes, smiling at him.

"Ready."

"Okay! Let's go get Luke, wherever he is...in the gym, probably...doesn't he have some sort of workout routine?" he said, half to himself.

Danny nodded. Sam jogged to the gym, wishing he had his skateboard, which he had left in his room. Skateboarding impressed all the chicks, including Carrie.

Wait. He had a sort of almost girlfriend, Carrie, but here he was, going to flirt with random girls? What kind of sort of almost boyfriend was he? ...but then again, you know, she was all the way in Carefree, long distance relationships were hard to keep up...who knows, maybe she found someone else... He shook his head, he didn't need to think about this, this was a favor for a friend.

He entered the gym, Danny behind him, and saw Luke lifting what he thought was a 2,000 pound weight. Wow.

"Hey! Luke! You coming with us? To teach Danny is the ways of romance?" Sam asked.

"Yeah." Luke nodded, shrugging on a sweatshirt. The three of them headed towards the hangar, Sam making a quick stop in his room to grab his skateboard. Tucking it under his arm, they got in on of the Birds, Luke piloting, Sam and Danny in the backseat.

Luke landed the ship in Bryant Park, in a grove of trees far from the people. He put the camouflage mode on, melding the ship in with the backdrop. The three teens exited the ship, heading to the center of the park, near the Josephine Shaw Memorial Fountain.

"So. Danny," Sam started, after they sat down one of the bistro tables set up near the fountain. "Determine which girl here is the prettiest."

"Beauty is on the inside," Danny said simply.

"Well, you can't really see the inside of girls! Which girl would you like to get to know?" Sam explained, growing frustrated.

Danny looked around, there were plenty of girls here, either out for a morning run (mm, jog bras and short shorts) or chatting with friends, eating pastries or drinking tea or coffee from the Bryant Park Cafe.

"Her," he said, pointing to one of the most unnoticable girls Sam had ever seen, with mousy brown hair pulled up in a small, messy bun, wearing a gray long sleeve shirt and denim shorts. She was sitting on a park bench, her nose buried in what looked like a textbook. Nerd.

"Dude. Seriously? You could do a whole lot better than her," Sam said dubiously. "Look." He turned Danny's head towards the other girls, the ones in jog bras and short shorts, the ones giggling at bistro tables. "How about...her," he said, grinning, at a tanned girl, with warm, silky brown hair pulled up in a pony tail, jogging.

"What about her?" Danny asked. Sam just had to roll his eyes at his cluelessness.

"She's hot. Drop dead gorgeous. Dayum sexy. Ring a bell?"

"She's PRETTY, sure, but what about her inner energy? Her chi? Does it sparkle with vitality and personality, or is it dull?"

"I have no idea what you just said."

Danny sighed, as if SAM was the clueless one. "Never mind. Just, keep an eye out for inner beauty, not just what's on the outside."

Uh huh, okay, yep, not happening. "Whatever. Let's just go." Sam stood up, Luke watching him with raised eyebrows.

"Um, yeah, I'm just gonna go...get some coffee..." Luke started walking to a coffee stand set up near the heart of the park. Wise decision, Luke. This might get awkward.

"Come come, Daniel. Let's go visit that girl," Sam said, motioning to a pretty blonde girl sitting on a park bench, reading what Sam assesed to be _The Fault in Our Stars._ Sam hated the ending, like, why did Gus have – ummm, what? He hadn't read that book AT ALL...

"Okay, so remember what I said. Sit next to her, talk to her about her book, maybe? Have you ever read The Fault in Our Stars?"

"No..." 

"Fine, whatever, I'll be an example." Sam rubbed his hands together, and sat down next to the girl. She briefly glanced up at him, then went back to reading. Then she glanced up again. Oh yeah, the double take! That totally means she's into you. Either that or you have something on your face, which Sam was ninety-nine percent sure he didn't.

"So. The Fault in Our Stars," he began.

The girl's lips quirked into a smile. "Yeah. It's a great book, I'm at the part where-"

"When Gus dies?" Sam said. Hey, just getting the conversation going.

"WHAT?!"

"Oh, um, you aren't there yet...?" 

"NO! YOU JUST SPOILED THE ENDING FOR ME!"

Shoot shoot shoot shoot. "Ohh...sorry...?"

"GET OUT OF MY SIGHT, YOU A-HOLE!" She didn't actually say a-hole, she said something his mother would not want him saying.

"Yep, getting out of your sight now..." Sam hurried back to where Danny was sitting at the bistro table where Luke was sipping coffee. "I know, I know, that failed."

"Failed is an understatement, man," Luke said, snorting.

"Am I really supposed to learn from you?" Danny asked, grinning. Ugh, Danny.

"Yes, yes you are, normally I can flirt better than that. You know, let's just go...I know EXACTLY where you need to go..."

…

"Speed dating?"

"Yes, speed dating. You get to know someone AND judge them based on their looks. How's that for you?" Sam said, huffy.

"Whatever..." Danny said, eyebrows raised.

Sam, Danny, and Luke stood looking up at XOXO, a trendy nightclub in uptown Manhattan. Sam knew that they did speed dating rounds here on Saturday, starting at 7 PM. It was 6:30 then, needless to say, the subway kind of sort of broke down...

XOXO catered to teens as their primary customers, 15+. Which was lucky for Sam, him being fifteen, from being fourteen a few months ago. Surprisingly, you didn't need ID, you just had to look 15+, which wasn't very safe in Sam's opinion. But hey, it was their club.

"I feel...overdressed," Danny said, staring horrified at the inside of the club, a dark, pulsing room illuminated only by strobe lights and...lasers? You could practically feel the vitality in the room, like the building itself had a heartbeat that matched the rhythym of the pop music.

The patrons in question did indeed not have many clothes on, but hey, it was teenagers you were talking about here. Go figure they'd act like mini strippers. "Yeah, you kinda. Just take your shirt off and you'll fit right in."

Luke grimaced. "I need air. I'm waiting outside." Smart decision, Luke. But this can't be avoided.

"Okay! So, just sign up right there on that screen-" Sam pointed to the glowing screen right next to the door, "and you enter your name, and they'll assign you a number. Remember that number, and the announcer will call two numbers, boy and girl, and that's your speed date. Each round lasts a minute."

"How do you know so much about speed dating?"

"Um, no comment."

"Oh-kay..."

Sam signed into the machine, getting number M67. He went to join the crowd, and quickly got sucked into the vortex of people. He barely registered the following moments, some girl's hands on him, getting elbowed by someone, the throbbing music. It was like a...a colorful, steamy haze, one that he wasn't broken out of until the annoucer got onto the voice over system.

"OKAY! Reporting over to the speed dating tables are pairings... F57 and M89, F23 and M38, F84 and M12," the announcer listed off more pairings, and Sam zoned out for a moment, until he heard "F45 and M67!" over the voice over system.

He ducked under dancing/body spasming teens – being short had its advantages – to the speed dating tables, shiny metallic bar tables near the back of the room.

"Guys, we'll do this the old fashioned way, you rotate while the girls sit at the tables. Girls, sit at the tables, and write your number on the white board before you."

Sam, like the plethora of other guys before him, scanned the tables, praying he'd get a hot girl. F45...there! Sitting at the table was a girl with bobbed black hair, snapping gum, dressed in a sequiny skin tight dress. Woah.

"So. Hey." he said, grinning in what he hoped was seductively.

"You're short." the girl said, snapping her gum loudly.

"What's that-"

"I wanted a HOT guy."

"That's offensive..." Sam muttered. They sat in silence for the remaining thirty seconds, before a buzzer sounded throughout the club. He hopped over to the next table, where a ginger haired girl sat, her hair dulled by the lack of light.

She smiled at him, something he took as a good sign. "Hi."

"Hey yourself."

"I'm new at this..."

"I am too. What's your name?"

"Rebel."

"That's an odd name."

"That it is. My older sister and her boyfriend named me."

"Cool."

"They're both writers. Well, a writer and actor." 

"Oh, cool. Would I know any of them?"

"Maybe. Ever heard of Raelynn Graham?"

"Ohh, that girl in Back in Black?"

"Yeah." 

"YOU'RE the daughter of her?"

"Uh huh."

"Who's your dad?"

"Asa Devin. Author of the book Back in Black."

"Oh my god, I loved that book!"

"I know, right? And I'm not just saying that."

"That's so-" BUZZ. "Cool," Sam finished. He scribbled down his phone number on the white board, then he scrambled to the other table.

…

Ten girls later (ten girls who were SO interested in him...maybe...) he was back with Danny at the bar, sipping a Coke. (XOXO wasn't THAT stupid, to give teenagers alcohol.) "So, you find anyone you like?" he asked.

Danny frowned. He looked like he'd just been through a tornado, hair messed up and his shirt riding up on him. Girls. "Well...they liked ME, but I'm not really sure if I liked THEM."

"Oh...well, you'll find the right girl for you sometime, maybe not today. There's no such thing as insta-love, I guess."

"Where'd you get this suddenly profound outlook on love?"

"I dunno. Speed dating changes you. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse."

"Did you meet anyone you liked?"

"Yeah, this one girl. She's practically famous, or related to famous people. Her older sister is an actress and her older sister's boyfriend is a bestselling writer."

"And she was nice?"

"Yeah. Well, I think." 

"Good for you, Sam. Really. But, can you do me a favor and let's leave?"

"Yeah, sure."

Sam and Danny left the nightclub, Sam glancing back at the nightclub behind him. He didn't notice the collision until Danny fell onto him, like dominos.

A figure had crashed into Danny, and as a result, Danny had crashed into Sam. "Hey! Watch it!" Sam said, not really thinking.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going..." a decidely female voice said. Sam squinted in the night light, and vaguely recognized the girl from earlier, Danny's first choice, with the glasses and bun and textbook.

Danny smiled. "No worries, it's fine. Hey, um, you look familiar, have I seen you around before?"

The girl squinted. "I don't think so...I mean, I don't recognize you..."

"Are you sure? I could have sworn I saw you somewhere..." Oh my god. Danny was doing it. Danny Rand was actually flirting. Well, making an attempt.

"What's your name?"

"Danny Rand."

"No, I don't think I've met you..."

"Well, let me introduce myself." Danny stuck out a hand. "Danny Rand."

"Olive Queensbury," the girl said, smiling.

"Nice to meet you, Olive. And, um, this might seem weird, like, I know I've just met you, but you seem so familiar...do you want to get coffee, or tea, or whatever you drink, tomorrow morning?" AHHH Sam just wanted to FANGIRL SQUEE right there because Daniel Thomas Rand'Kai was FLIRTING.

"Woah. That was fast. Why not?"

And now Danny Rand had a DATE! Danny's BACK IN THE GAME!

Danny and Olive exchanged phone numbers, and Olive said she had to go home, so she left Danny smiling on the sidewalk and Sam like he was about to explode of happiness.

"I've taught you well, Danny. You've learned a lot."

 **If I feel like it, I might make this a two shot, with Sam/Rebel and Danny/Olive. Maybe.**


End file.
